Thursday, October 28, 2010

Journey-Facing Reality and Moving forward

Life is a long journey. It involves choices you make and also you’re affected by other people’s choices. There is good and bad combined in everything we do. Currently I am experiencing both regarding choices I have made in my life. I am feeling some of the affects from the bad choices I’ve made, but I also can see blessings coming my way for good choices that I am making today. I have had to come face to face with life--literally going full force into a major reality check within the last 2 weeks. What brought this on? E-Harmony- since deciding that I would like to pursue the idea of dating with the hopes of marriage, truth has really hit me in the face.

What do I mean exactly? Well, one example it my weight. I don't want to be like this for the rest of my life. I certainly do not want to be a mom or a wife like this, and certainly would not want to try and do mission’s works being like this. So what am I going to do about it? I am going to make a choice. I know what I want and I need to go for it. No more excuses. Just need to make better choices. Now, I don't eat horribly all the time, but I also know I don't focus on all the 4 food groups every day either. So here's to a new change in that. I also want to implement the "Crack the Fat Loss Code" method again. I now know how important it was for me to function and feel better.

I am copying a segment from a blogger whom is an inspiration to me and many others. His name is Sean. I think I used some of his quotes in past blogs as well. If anyone wants to visit his blog, you can do it here.

Anyway, this particular paragraph really spoke to me.
Remember, I'm still a food addict, always will be. I'm recovered, but aware. How does it work? If you want this to be the very last time you ever need to lose weight---If you want to make this THE TIME when you really do it, for real...You must realize the vital element of dropping the excuses and rationalizations that make us feel better about bad choices. You must remind yourself how important this entire journey is---you must embrace 100% self honesty and self responsibility in your choices and circumstances. When you do that---you realize, it's not someone's fault if they brought something yummy or the restaurant's fault or the holiday's fault...or anything or anyone else. It's us and our choices. We have the comfort in knowing that we can still have anything we want---there's no deprivation, but we also know that we have a Calorie Bank and Trust account that must remain intact--the integrity of that calorie budget is and must be maintained, because when we start making rationalizations to "break it," or "have just a little more, or just this time," those thoughts and actions are the beginning of the end. And the end, well--that's a very sad place. "Oh well, we'll start again some other time," right? NO--this is the time, now--today---we must embrace consistency---that's how I lost 212 pounds the first 365 days---It was consistency....maintain it, take pride in it, defend it from your emotions and circumstances at every turn, and get ready---because amazing results are coming your way. And those incredible goodies...make sure you eat some every now and then...because that's what normal people with normal, healthy relationships with food, do.

Another good example of going face to face with reality is what my goals in life are. A guy who I am communicating with on E-harmony asked this question, "Going forward from today, what are 3 main goals you would like to achieve in your life?” WOW! That was a really good question and seriously, it made me think. I sat there and pondered on this for many minutes. What are my goals? What and how would I like to accomplish them? This question is an amazing thing because it made me come to terms with the fact that yes, I want way more in life than I give myself credit for. I am not some person who should be sitting around, moping that I don't have a life like this person or that person--trying to live a life of comparison. No! My life is different. I have a calling. I have aspirations that are ACHIEVABLE!!! I do not have to think that all I am good for is a sit down job, just working to pay off bills. UGH! How DEPRESSING! No, I am better than that. I have passions, wants and interests. I want to shoot for my goals. Make some tangible changes in my life and start "doing". HA HA! This is so liberating!!!!

So, facing reality isn't a bad thing, it's a really good thing. Understanding who you are and how your life's journey is affecting you is important. Everyone has the good and bad from choices they made-no one is perfect. It's all about how are we dealing with them today. How are we stepping forward with purpose? Are we making a difference or would we like to make a difference? Come join me on the “Reality Journey” and let's move forward from today.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Modern Slavery - Human Trafficking

As I wrote in my last post, I talked about getting informed, being aware of what is going on next door--right under our very noses. This is so sad and it breaks my heart.

This video portrays some of the true realities of Modern Day Slavery that is going on around the world. The sad thing is, children are being used for man’s pleasure. AWFUL!!! It really sickens me that people are so sick as to think it's OK to use a child for their own personal needs. These kids are living in an actual hell.

Dear God, may we always pray for our kids, may we watch out for their best and keep them safe. May we raise them up to be men and women of God so that they can go out and make a difference in this world. I pray for those children and adults being used and abused for man's carnal pleasures and I pray for your justice to be brought down on those people doing this.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Awareness-Did you know?

Ok, this is a serious post and definitely not for the faint of heart, so please bear with me.

I am a strong believer in increasing awareness of what is going on in our neighborhoods today. I may write about this issue periodically because I want to be a part of something bigger. An issue that I am learning more and more about is how big human trafficking is in the United States. Most people hear about this issue in other countries but do they realize what is going on in their very own neighborhoods? Is anyone aware of how many runaways are abducted for Human Trafficking?

Did you know that...
The U.S Department of state in June 2010 released their 2010 Report on Human Trafficking. Here are some of the quotes from that report.

"Worldwide, the State Department estimated there are 12.3 million adults and children in modern-day slavery – including forced labor, bonded labor and forced prostitution," Inter Press Service reports. "That means just under two people in a thousand are victims of human trafficking. According to the report, the "U.S. is a source as well as a transit and destination country for people forced into labor, debt bondage and prostitution"...."Involuntary servitude is not something we can ignore or hope doesn't exist in our own community".

This video explains it all.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Too funny

Ok, so you know in my last post I talked about possibly joining e-harmony. Well, I bit the bullet and did it.

I have to wonder about what some of the guys are thinking when they post pictures like this as their profile pictures.

Or how about the muscle man look. Man o man, this is certainly the match for me.

LOL! Oh, but the best one I couldn't find to post. It was a picture of a guy standing with a Hooters girl giving him a side hug. Really????

I am certainly learning a lot this time around on my journey through e-harmony. I am trying really hard to just have fun with it and not take it extremely seriously. But I sure do get some good laughs out of it, thats for sure.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Finished Painting- Easter Lilly

So, here is the finished product. I am really excited about this one and I think it came out really well. I am so looking forward to displaying it in my bedroom. ;-)
I was trying to be extra creative but also wanted to show you what it looked like in all the different light settings so I took several shots. This is the close up with flash.

This one below is with full flash.

This one below is with soft flash.

This one below is without flash.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Sometimes the answer is simpler than you think

Life has certainly been interesting. I have been adjusting to a lot of change (new roommate, loss of a roommate, lack of furniture in the house......). Change is change, but who said we needed to handle it well? Actually, I don't think I'm handling it badly, it's just not always fun. When you have a new roommate in the house, everyone has to get used to each other--especially if you haven't known the new person since just a bit before move-in day. Sometimes I wonder about things like, will she like me? Will we get a long? I hope we become friends. Sigh...... This all takes time.

On another note, I have been thinking about whether or not I am ready to hit the dating websites again. To be honest, it scares me. Am I ready for all the rejection that comes with it? Am I ready to actually go on a date? Should I lose 5000 pounds before I can even go on a date? Will guys even like me right now? How should I act or feel????? Am I taking this too far??? ;-) Seriously, I think I am taking this too far. I know deep down that it is not always about how you look (although it matters) but how you portray yourself. Are you self confident? Are you easily swayed by other people’s opinions? Are you rooted in the Lord? (Being rooted in the Lord is certainly an issue that I am trying to make better) I know deep down that if I were to just really focus on my relationship with God, then all of the other things will come into place. I cannot do this on my own. I have to walk in God's footsteps in order for things to become clear, and for the path to be easier to follow.

It’s funny because now that I think of it, it's just a normal process. We all have to put ourselves out there in order to have relationships, and it is no different with meeting a guy. I know that I have to give all of my fears and concerns to the Lord and know that He will guide me in the right path. It's just so scary. I often wonder, will I ever meet a guy who will love me for who I really am, not just what I look like? I think this way for myself as well. Will I find that man who I will love no matter what he looks like? Where is he? Does he love the Lord? Is he working on himself right now, preparing himself for marriage? What is he doing right now? What career path is he on? Does he love missions? Does he love kids? Is he a good family guy and easy to get along with?

What am I doing in order to prepare for things like this? How am I preparing spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, financially? It's all overwhelming. When I start to get on the right path, I tend to try and work on everything at once, then I get overwhelmed and fail big time. Sigh...... It's a one-step-at-a-time process. No one is perfect. We all have flaws and it will take a lifetime to work out all of our kinks. But, I am so glad that God is on our side, because I don't know how else I would get through all this healing and change without him. I want to be that type of person someday who is well balanced and has a good view on life. I don't think I am there yet. One can only guess what that actually looks like.

But the answer is quite clear and simple- Focus on the Lord and he will make your path straight.